THIS BLOG IS INSPIRED BY MY OWN EXPERIENCES, BY PEOPLE I COME ACROSS IN MY DAILY TRAVELS, and THE THINGS I'VE COME TO UNDERSTAND.
I write firstly for myself, as though writing in my private Journal, writing with the freedom of not editing my thoughts. Writing is simply a personal tool for me, and I choose to release it publicly because it may give insight to someone else.
Now just to touch on my past... I AM NOT A PRODUCT OF MY PAST so I will not recount 'The Story' of the past! My past includes all the usual: deception, betrayal, abuse, loss, heart ache, fear, loneliness, self-isolation all leading to chronic stress, post traumatic stress, depression, anxiety, panic attacks, acting out, a death wish and attempts at suicide. I sank all the way to the bottom and didn't know if i would ever get out of the pit of agony. But, i did! And I did it without drugs, I did it without support. …I did it with sheer determination on a hope! So, I am here to let you know, it is possible! That ALL things are possible with a HOPE, A VISION and INSPIRED ACTION.
Because of the things i have experienced in life, the CONTRAST it has given me… I see my self as having had a great, and beautiful opportunity to now know myself to the core and to be settled in my existence; my body, mind and emotions, without any worry about how others may perceive me and with trust in the unfolding future. I tap into sheer happiness daily because I choose to. Anything below happiness rarely occurs anymore because I have practiced clarity of focus.
LOATHING THE BEGINNING Naturally, at first I felt forced by life-circumstances I initially felt extremely angry because I felt robbed of 'My-Self', "My Life"
I soon decided the only way out, that in order to survive and gain some control back, some certainty, (on all levels) I had to quickly understand the human-psyche and the innate workings of the world.
WHAT A CRAZY STORY I HAD! I delved into 'The Story' of my life... learned to accept that the ‘horror’ was to be part of me saw that 'what had been done to me' did not make me un-loved, un-wanted, less-than, damaged, shameful, wrong. MORE ABOUT MY STORY HERE: http://blip.tv/tough-times/toughtimess05e11dvd-5969348
I accepted that there were choices in ‘here’ that I could make at every juncture and to my advantage I was a learner and no longer wanted to mentally tear myself down.
I used all of the information to grow me up (not tear me down). I then let go of 'The Story' because there was no longer a story to hang onto, and without the hold of a past, I am able, and inspired daily, to create the future I choose.
I now know without a doubt now, what I didn't know then, and it is what I want to share w you through my writings.
WE ALL NEED TO KNOW THIS... We can 'heal' completely we won't get your old self back but once we’ve surrendered to the new depth of ‘I’ we wont ever want to go backwards. We will get past the past and shake off the shadows of our past We stop feeling anxious We feel normal and whole and authentic again We become connected and tuned in and present! We fall completely in Love and not feel a victim of fear of loss or betrayal. We will live your passion again and be able to shine again!
..for those who have never had it, it is there for you to discover!
I have shared this experience with others who went on to experience it!
I Am right here to let You know, without a doubt, IT IS Possible!
~----~~----~~----~~----~~----~~----~~----~~- I WOULD LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU! so that I may share your story. you will remain anonymous! I will write back! WRITE TO ArtOfExpression@live.com ~----~~----~~----~~----~~----~~----~~----~~-
BACKGROUND INFO About Me I always pursued my passions! …it was what was most important to me being me!
CERTIFICATIONS I started out doing a Fine Art Degree focusing on Photography, Film and Drama at La Trobe University. Out of that I have worked as a fashion catalogue photographer, assistant photographer for forensics, wedding photographer, had a few art exhibitions, done a ton of modelling and have taken thousands of photos (lots on my FB) and a whole bunch of footage.
Later i studied a science degree of Naturopathy (Natural Medicine). I trained in Iridology, Herbs, Nutrition, Massage and Counselling at the Endeavour College in Melbourne. I specialised in Iridology. I supplemented my knowledge by furthering my Iridology training, and also learned Sclerology Diagnostics, with renowned Iris-Sclera Diagnostician Douglas Morrisson, the author of 'Body Electronics Fundamentals' and 'How We Heal'. I was asked to work as a health counsellor at 'The Colon Clinic' in Moorabin. Most of the patients were women. Many were concerned about loosing weight, most were suffering with cancer. There were a few women who were not having success conceiving naturally and i was their last ditch try before IVF. On a natural diet that was right for them, taking herbs that promoted fertility, they all had beautiful perfectly healthy babies! I received photos of the women glowing, holding their Child. That was a whole lot of proof right their about the natural wisdom of the body; not producing offspring from a sick body. This was a very rewarding job but after a year i realised it wasn't my purpose in life. Although, health and wellbeing is still very much a passion. From this experience, i became very aware that fundamentally at a conscious level, we all want the same thing, we want to feel ownership of our life.
PIVOTAL CHILDHOOD EXPERIENCES I grew up being fascinated with the effect different herbs and food have on the body. My Dads Mum was a nurse. As she was the wife of a minister, they spent 2 years on Vanuatu with their 2 year old son (my Dad). They gained, and went on to share a lot of knowledge from their time there. My Mum came from a vegetarian upbringing, they were educated vegetarians and were knowledgable on food combining to get enough protein and have a balanced diet. From the age of 2, we lived next door to a Greek family who had moved to Australia from a Greek Island. They proudly brought with them their native knowledge of herbs and healthy food. And at the end of our court was an Italian Mumma that i loved to visit because she would share her knowledge on which herb to add to which food to aid digestion and teach me how too cook. I got cooking lessons from everyone! Dad taught me about organic gardening.
One of my Brothers lost 90% of his vision and became covered in acne head to toe, apparently because of a virus that had entered Mums body during pregnancy. He was put on a steroid treatment but seemed to be getting worse, so i started heavily researching. I came up with a natural solution, and my Brother obliged me by taking the herbs i presented him. One of them was Fenugreek (curry seed) which he needed to soak until it swelled into a slimy gloopy lump at the bottom of the cup, reeking of curry, and drink it all down first thing in the morning. In under 2 hours he would have a pungent curry smell coming out of every pore of his body. My Brother was studying and needed to attend large lectures, so staying away from people was not an option! But his acne cleared up very quickly and his eyesight came back. Helping to heal my brother gave me a load of confidence in Natural Medicine.
The 2 things that happened that drove my passion into greater action were, Mum dying from cancer; 2 tumours, one on her spine and the other in her brain. And Dad had a heart attack where he died and was brought back to life and given a triple bypass. My life was an experiment... I read books on how the body works, tried every health diet, herb, supplement, eaten one food for a week, different one each week, a different herb each month, tried all the cleanses, and noted the effects on me.
I had always believed that we are our own healers, that we posses the innate wisdom over our body, that we can overcome anything. I believed that our perception of our situation, the story we tell ourselves, created the ultimate outcome. I had the scientific knowledge, and had a ton of experience personally and as a witness, with the effects our beliefs has on our body. I held pressure points on a person meditating on 'The Story' to reaching the truth, and they said that the moment they came to the realisation of the truth and then passed that, to becoming re-connected with thier own energies, the story no longer existed, and without the story the pain in their body (the hold over them) was released and i saw the most amazing thing, their spine that was twisted and distorted moved back into it's natural formation and stayed there. Over the course of a week, i witnessed people's grey head of hair return to the original colour whether black, brown or blonde. I have witnessed eye color changes as people released the stories they had been repeatedly living and beating them selves up with. I have witnessed people looked ten years younger because they are living the right life for them.
PIVOTAL ADULT EXPERIENCES I attended a Tao (Taoism) centre for a year. "In a nutshell, Taoism is the consolidation of a number of concepts and practices that make up the "Path", or "Way", of living. The consolidation of ideas and concepts include basic principles or "theories" regarding the body, diet, breathing and physical exercises, uses of herbs, philosophical inquiry and, of course, meditation. All of which the Taoist feels brings a human being into closer alignment with the "natural order" of life and living - a pathway that humankind appears to have gotten derailed from." I had heard the people there were looking younger and younger because they were freeing themselves from their past, meditated daily and followed a natural diet. The first time i met the 'master', it was as though he glided across the floor, he moved with agility and grace. It was a fantastic experience and i really wanted to continue with the practicse; the meditations, the rituals and especially the intensive retreats full of inspirational talks from the 'master', morning tai chi and meditations. And, I had relaxed so much that the lines in my face had almost disappeared! Only, it wasn't my purpose.
Although, I still had a reservation because I had seem my mum die from cancer, and it seemed so powerful. I wondered what would happen if I was faced with it, where I would feel threatened with such loss. Could I really accept it and at the same time do everything i could to heal my self.
I had an accident where i fell 1.5 stories to the ground from a tree and it gave me the perfect opportunity to put my beliefs, and courage, to the test. As a means to understand the extent of my belief in Natural Medicine Here is the story… Half my body hit the edge of outdoor furniture damaging 4 ribs and damaging 2 disks in the lower back, before crashing to the ground on the other side of my body damaging 2 ribs and damaging disks in my neck. I lay motionless. My body was going into unconsciousness to deal with the pain, the way the body does. My body felt extremely heavy and lifeless. I felt intense fear at being trapped inside my body. There were people there who were going to call an ambulance, and had i passed out, i would have been fine, i would have come to in a hospital. I realised that this was a perfect opportunity to put my believes into action and to the real test, so i fought against going unconscious. In a semi conscious state, i told the person with their ear to my mouth that i didn't need an ambulance. This was a very close friend who knew what i meant, I needed to know without a doubt if it were possible for me to self heal naturally, and despite their own fears, after asking me are you sure, allowed me to follow my own process. I just wanted the opportunity to assess my self, and if i needed to go to hospital i most certainly would have. The fear was powerful and i felt myself wanting to slip into panic, I made it ok, because i was going to asses my situation, and the fear stepped back, and i was able to think with absolute clarity. I went straight to my bare feet... am i paralysed or not, could i feel the air, i couldn't, ok what does that mean, my body could be in shock, can i feel the air on my face or my hands, i couldn't, i would definitely be in shock from the impact, i needed to let that wear off before i could tell if i were paralysed. So, i waited by shifting my focus internally to see if i could feel any changes there. I had ben winded and i felt shook up, not right. After a while i felt a slight breeze touch the top of my toes, and i could feel it on my hands and face. That was a good start. I went back to internally, because the winded feeling was also in my lungs and i knew i had damaged ribs that could have damage my lung/s. I only knew some ribs were broken because i had heard them crack and felt them push in on my organs....had i punctured my lung/s. I slowly tried to take a deeper breath, i wanted to very gently expand my lungs to see what was going on, but i couldn't. My breathing was extremely shallow and fast and my heart beat rapid, that could be a sign of a punctured lung, or simply shock and would pass... i will closely monitor that, if the lung was punctured i would get sharp stabbing chest pain with deeper breathing, i will ry to breath when my heart beat slows down (meaning i was coming out of shock) Also, i noted i would listen for crackling and wheezing, as gas would not be able to escape from a damage lung, and it would finally cause my lungs to collapse. I was really hoping it was only the muscles around the ribcage and the ribs that were damaged. I needed to get into a semi-upright position soon. At least my heart seemed to be ok, i was pretty sure the upper ribs that protected the heart were intact. Had the ribs done damage to the blood vessel servicing the heart or a even made a tear in the main artery of the body i would not have had that rapid heart beat. Next was the spleen, which is located on the left side of the abdomen....ok, remember, splenic rupture bleeds into the abdominal cavity and would cause rapid swelling. Which i didn't have. I was ticking off, one by one, every possible consequence of the fall and putting each assessment in order of attention. The story goes on, but i will end it here to say that when the shock wore off, from the chair i was propped in, i rang my Doctor and ran through my checklist of symptoms and later had a scan and visited a Neurosurgeon for tests. I didn't walk for 3 months after the accident, slept semi upright for a year, and collapsed, walked into door frames instead of walking through them, and dropped things many times in 2 years of healing. I successfully avoided prescription strength pain-killing drugs and healed myself beyond repair. I am fitter now than i was then! My belief was put to the test!
I feel I am now a wealth of experiential, practical and theoretical information. When ever someone asks me how I got to be so healthy and happy, I happily share.
BUSINESS BACKGROUND In 1999 I began a business called ArtOfExpression Productions.TM. ArtOfExpression Productions.TM was formed so that I could present health talks, facilitate women’s groups and remain involved in my creative side with children's entertainment and face-painting, street performances, footage for community TV and Youtube, blogging and charity projects. I spent half my time volunteering as a Youth Mentor and was given the title of ambassador for a Children's Charity. I aligned myself with the Port Phillip Community Group and ran a women’s Art Group out of the community centre for over 7 years.
In 2014 I started creating the speaker training platform for women that has been in my mind for a very long time. It draws on All of my experience, training, and access to great mentors; some of the most amazingly talented and switched on people I have encountered.
ACTIVITIES In 2009 I joined RAG Theatre Troupe here in the Arts capital of Australia, Melbourne. In 2010 I became RAG's recruiter-promoter. I am still actively involved. RAG provided me with a great opportunity to immerse myself in the experience of a diverse group of people from the Community, who would otherwise not have the opportunity to get training and act on stage. RAG is much more than that, it is an accepting and encouraging ground giving each person a platform to tap into their innate creativity and freely express them self. RAG runs 6 months of the year and during that time has a weekly workshop ran by NIDA trained Actor-Director Scott Gooding. Scott is a creative genius the way he strikes up concepts and allows the creative process to evolve among the group.
For 2 years I was part of an independent film crew, where I interviewed and presented topics of Community interest.
Thank you for being here. I look forward to sharing experiences.